Moms Helping Moms

The media has a way of making moms feel like something they tell us is supposed to be a  "newsflash"....for example, a celebrity becomes a mom for the first time and after a few months of motherhood gives a quote in an interview something to the effect of, "mom's can't have it all".  And this declaration is on the news, on the internet, in the magazines and we moms are supposed to read that and say, "Oh we can't, I didn't know that til it was just pointed out!"  Really???

Here's the newsflash- no offense to the new celebrity mom who was just giving her thoughts, but WE ALREADY KNOW THIS!  We certainly don't need a reminder of this fact.  We live with the humility of this knowledge everyday.  We are constantly in a guilt battle over what family priority comes first and how do we work that around our job or our kids or our friendships or our spouse, or our ME time?

What has become a newsflash to me in the past few months is how little credit we give ourselves.  And what I have learned about myself in the last few months is how little I have accepted help over the years from moms willing to lend a helping hand.  I have had a very bad habit of not asking for help and not accepting it when offered.  Well with 2 growing kids at different stages in their lives, working full time, and a husband that works full time- this has become an even greater flaw of mine.

So I would like to take the time to share what examples I have seen of moms helping other moms to "have it all" and how moms I know have sacrificed so their families can "have it all" and how I am trying to follow their lead!

A very kind mom helped me get Big Bro T to his Tae Kwon Do class one week (when I couldn't be in 2 places at once) so he didn't miss a class and didn't miss getting the Student of the Month certificate (that is a big deal in his world).  The guilt of me failing him helped me find the humility to accept her help.

A very well educated mom took a job in a field that she is way overqualified for so that she works closer to home and has a more flexible schedule for her family.  And she does this knowing her children will never know the sacrifice she is making for them.  Her selfless act is a reminder to me that we don't always get to be the mommy we want to be, we get to be the mommy we need to be.

A mom raising 3 kids under 5 at home helps out another mom by taking care of her 2 kids (under 4) for a month until they can start at their new preschool.  I cannot even imagine how she gets them all down for nap time, but I know that dropping off her favorite Starbucks drink might help get her thru the afternoon. :)

Three moms took the time out of their busy schedules to surprise me with a Birthday night out!  Since Lil Sis B has a birthday 2 days after mine, my birthday can get lost in the shuffle.  Yes they found me on a Friday night in my pajamas at 7pm but I managed to throw on some jeans and stay up past 11pm!

Single moms who do double duty will always have my love and support!  As will the moms that keep calling to set up coffee dates with me- even though I cancel a lot- thanks for hanging in there!

And you HAVE to have the mommy friend that can see you struggling to manage your toddler in a public arena, pull out her cell phone and take a picture of you so you can laugh about it later!! 


Learning to ask for help and learning to accept help with motherhood is a humbling process I am stumbling thru.  Trying to do it all so that you can have it all (whatever "all" is) is not a goal of mine. 

The media may be shocked to learn that some of us mommies just want to have "some" of it all! :)




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